Therapists I have known

So I am in the oh so fortunate position of looking for a new therapist. *sigh* Some of you may be shocked at the prospect of a therapist herself being in therapy but I'll let you in on a secret - most are, and if they're not they should be. It is hard being a therapist and it's no good bringing your own crap into the room with you. The last thing anyone needs is a therapist with issues.

Like therapist #1, - psychologist, who was actually a very nice woman and skillful in her interventions. Alas, she couldn't remember by name. She always called me Lisa, even made my receipts out to Lisa. When I confronted her on it, she said I reminded her of someone she knew in high school. And she still called me Lisa.

Therapist #2 - psychiatrist, only interested in talking about my father. At our first session, she asked what was troubling me. I told her I needed help with exam stress. She asked about my father. I told her that we had a good relationship and I was really more concerned with the mild panic attacks I was having around school. She asked more pointed questions about my father. Needless to say, I didn't go back for a second session.

Therapist # 3 - also a psychiatrist. Couldn't seem to remember me from week to week. Always did a suicide checklist (I've never had a suicidal thought in my life) at the start of every session. Never remembered anything about my life from session to session. Never told me her first name. Very bad at her job. Apparently only hired because her husband was one of the best doctors on staff. Just my luck.

Therapist # 4 - student intern, psychoanalyst - very nice, very timid, no impact positive or negative. It was like talking to myself. But since I like the sound of my own voice, not so bad.

Therapist #5 - psychologist - group therapy. Put me in a group where everybody had the exact opposite problem from me. I guess she felt since the general topic was the same, it would be okay. Not so much. Also did nothing to moderate. Just closed the door and then said "Okay, we need to wrap up" 50 minutes later.

Therapist #6 - MD Psychotherapist (basically a doctor who has read a bit of Freud and Rogers and feels capable of counselling, don't get me started). First wanted me to sit at the end of his desk in a little plastic chair as if I was in a doctor's office asking for a flu shot. At my look of horror, he offered me a seat on the couch. He even graciously pushed aside a pile of garbage - empty wrappers, dirt-streaked papers - so I could sit on the stained cushion. Nice. Then he put his feet up on his desk, looked out the window, and never looked at me again. Halfway through the session I gave up on him and basically stopped talking. He didn't notice.

Therapist #7 - Psychoanalyst. Okay enough lady. Kept gapping out. She'd glaze over staring at her paper. When she suddenly realized I hadn't been talking for several minutes she would start, blink rapidly and try to cover by saying "You've been quiet. Where were your thoughts just now?" Uh-huh, right. Plus, she had frog eyes. Very distracting.

Therapist #8 - Psychotherapist, M.A. - Very smart, quite on the ball. In the first session had me all figured out. Told me what my problem was, why I thought what I thought. Didn't actually check in with me to see if she was right. A fair bit of projection (see above re: therapists with issues).

Therapist #9 - Social Worker - I actually liked her a lot and we did some good work together. But even she had problems. Liked to give her opinion often on when I should have children. Strange, I thought that was my decision....

Anyway, you can see why the idea of yet again trying to find a therapist is a little daunting. Well, as we like to say, grist for the mill.