Get off the frickin' sidewalk!

So, I have two pet peeves related to sidewalk use. Well, I say pet peeves but they're more like massive annoyances that make me want to punch people in the head. Of course, being me who dislikes confrontation, I usually contain myself to the dirty look and the half-turned head as they pass me by (you know that one - Seinfeld demonstrated it beautifully in the movie theatre). Anyway, my grievances are these: 1) people who are over the age of 12 who ride their bikes on the sidewalk and 2) people who use golf umbrellas as personal umbrellas on the sidewalk.

So first the bikes. Okay, I get that Toronto is a scary place to ride a bike. Traffic is crazy, pedestrians appear out of nowhere. But I'm not talking about Yonge Street. I'm talking about High Park where the streets are super wide and there is hardly any traffic. Today I was out walking my dog and some jerk in his thirties is riding up the sidewalk. There is not a single car on the road but instead of going on to the road to let me pass, I had to pull up Buddy tight against me and press against a shrub for him to go by. Ugh. I'm still getting mad thinking about it now. Frickin asshole.

And then, the umbrellas. WTF with business men who just whip their golf umbrella out of their car trunks and proceed to walk down very crowded sidewalks on streets like Bloor or Yonge? They piss me off. They don't look where they're going. They don't raise the umbrella as they pass by so it doesn't bean me in the forehead. They just take up the whole frickin' sidewalk like the frickin' jerks they are. Stupid entitled asses. There's a reason they make golf umbrellas and personal umbrellas. Golf umbrellas are for golf courses. Personal umbrellas are for everywhere else. And I feel I have to say, I have never seen a woman with a golf umbrella on the sidewalk, unless she was with a man. More gendered behaviour, IMO - women don't dare inconvenience others by taking up space where as men just take it all on and don't even think about the fact that they are invading everyone else's space with their ridiculous umbrellas. Now I realize this is a vast generalization and that many men are considerate and understand proper umbrella use. But I'm still waiting to see a woman with a golf umbrella on Bloor Street.

Ugh, people. Use sidewalks with just an ounce of thought! Or one of these days you might find your self at the business end of a withering stare from yours truly. And you do not want that. Trust me. I stare real good.